God Is In The Good And Bad (And He Really Was!) | Life Update/Reflection

June has been a lot to say in the least.

It seems like so long since I wrote the post picking out this month’s scripture.

This month has been one of the tightest budgets we have had. I have been stretching everything grocery wise in our household to last this month from one grocery trip at the start of the month.

I knew writing the post and choosing this scripture God would speak to me through it.

But I honestly had NO idea just what He was going to do…

And then I took a break from writing this, and Thursday of last week happened…

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I didn’t want to blog.

I didn’t want to write.

I felt so defeated.

Because at the time I started to write this post I was under the impression we were clear for June. We did it. God gave me the lessons I needed for the month. But we would have the blessing of the GI bill to start July with. We could get groceries. We could pay July’s bills.

And then it was Thursday, June 28th, 2018. 

That morning we had received less than 1/7th of what we usually receive. The rent would not be paid. The bills would not be paid. We would have no groceries, and we were on our last items already.

We had to do what I was dreading. Pull out all our remaining savings. We had enough in our savings to pay the rent and bills. Not counting groceries or gas money.

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The way the GI bill works for someone who is out of the military is you receive money to help with bills/books during the time you are in school. You only get money while you are attending class, so if you do not attend class to fulfill the basic requirements (usually 12 credits or more) you do not get money or less.

We knew this but thought we would be okay for July because my husband started a full summer term with classes.

That afternoon when my husband came back from class, he let me know what our situation was like. I spent that day talking to God a lot, and trying to fight against the lingering doubt, fear, and worry that beckoned to be invited into my heart. “It’s your fault. You caused this. You should have gotten a job…” 

Cue flashbacks in my mind. 

A couple weeks ago, and I did talk about this in my 900 Followers | When I Had No One I have people in my life who have no idea what I am doing as a blogger and as a writer. I was getting comments and suggestions to just get a job for financial stability, which I totally get by the way, and leave the writing for later.

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During this past month, and in the past, I’ve felt that my value as a person only matters in $ signs.

In my eyes and how I feel people internalize what I am doing if I am not investing my time into a job that produces money. I am lazy. I am not a good wife. If it has no $ attached it does not matter. My efforts do not matter.

The comments tore me apart.

I questioned everything about myself and what I was doing as a writer. Tears falling. Pleading to God. “Help me know if I am doing what You want to me to do because if I am then I know You will provide. Am I doing what Your plan is for me? Please, if You want, say something.”

There have been only three distinct times in my life prior to where I would open the Bible randomly, and my eyes would lay on a scripture that spoke EXACTLY what I needed or felt in the moment.

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As you may imagine, my sight became blurry when the first scripture I saw said, “All this, said David, the Lord made me understand in writing by His hand upon me, all the works of these plans.” 2 Chronicles 28:19

Too many times, He has revealed things to me as I write. √

As I am crying out to Him, feeling acknowledged, I then notice my mug of popsicle sticks, which some of you may know from my Alphabet Devotional. One of them, in particular, was sticking up out of the cup really high. And I just had a feeling that said, “Pick that one up and read the word.”

Trembling hands, the word I picked said, “Confidence.” 

Only a few days before, the story I shared that week in the blogging community was how a pastor told me that, “I have confidence in God, but not in myself. I need to have confidence in myself.” 

THEN as I was listening to music, a song RANDOMLY plays, one I had NEVER heard before…

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Confidence by Sanctus Real  (lyric video). 

The song talks about being afraid and asking God to help us face our circumstances with confidence.

Despite not knowing what was going to happen I felt reassured.

But then Thursday hit, and I did not know what to do. But I remembered what He was telling me about confidence. I kept telling myself, “God has never failed you. He has always had a plan. He has always MADE a way!” 

Again, I was listening to music and a song was playing that I had not really paid attention to just yet till that moment.

I don’t usually share lyrics, but I’m going to share the lyrics that stood out to me.

Do It Again by Elevation Worship (lyric video)

I’m still in Your hands/This is my confidence/You’ve never failed me yet.

You made a way/ When there was no way

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. . . Everything I’ve struggled with, and everything I was reminding myself of. He reminded me HE WAS WITH ME! The lessons He has imparted to me STILL STAND as they are. I have a confidence because of Him. He has NOT failed me. He has always made a way. 

God is there in the good and He is there in the bad. I felt in my heart, “The bigger the testimony you want to give, the bigger the mountain must be to fall down.”

On my knees, I prayed for His hand, and the next day we received more money in three different deposits for our GI bill. It was not the full amount, but it paid the rent and allowed us room to breathe. Praise His name!

The week of this happening, my husband JUST started a new part-time job. THE TIMING! It did not change our current circumstances, but I SEE how God can use the situation for His glory! 

I am striving to work on trusting God and seeing His plan despite what everyone else and myself see which is a messy circumstance in front of us. 

But the clouds have not parted yet. When the truth of what will happen in the long run has not yet been revealed. 

June scripture – (NIV) Job 2:10, “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?”

(I just want to add, I always discuss with my husband about our financial circumstance and currently he is okay with me not having a job. This may of course change. But I always consult him.) 

Has God spoken to you like this? 
How is God speaking to you in your trial?
I hope this spoke to you! 

And Remember...Be The Salt Of The earthAnd The Light On The HillWe Are His Branches1

New month scripture is coming soon! 

*** Community Prayer Request For July ’18 – Join Me In Praying For Each Other And If You Have A Request To Add Let Me Know. A New Prayer Request Post Comes Out Every Month And Is Updated As Requests And Updates Come In. 

Second Blog: Peeking Beneath

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49 thoughts on “God Is In The Good And Bad (And He Really Was!) | Life Update/Reflection

  1. So inspiring! I love when you have serendipitous moments where God is clearly trying to tell you something.
    I understand if you feel like this goes against your mission, but just an idea–you could make a Patreon and write on there that there’s no pressure to donate, but since you’re a full time Christian blogger, anything helps. If a tenth of your followers donated a dollar or two a month, that would be one or two more grocery trips right there. I don’t have much either, but I could definitely give a dollar or two a month. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Lily!!! Yes, those moments are always incredible and I think I can safely say, for me, they always bring me to overwhelming tears of feeling HIs love.

      I have definitely considered it 🙂 I believe in the blessing of giving and if people want to help out, I don’t want to take that from them. Thanks for your encouragement!!! If I ever do, I will definitely let people know. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Amen and Praise God! So glad to hear that you cried out to Him and then you heard Him . This happens to me and it’s such a blessing. We also live on the edge with one income and God has taken care of us for 27 years with six kids, sometimes in very unexpected ways. Keep trusting!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I so relate in so many different ways. My trial is not financial, at least not yet, but what you have shared still speaks volumes to my heart, so thanks! I cried through half of it.

    This stood out to me: “But the clouds have not parted yet. When the truth of what will happen in the long run has not yet been revealed.”

    The Lord gave me a poem to write on that subject a couple of days ago. It is called “Weathering the Storm.” https://runwithit.blog/2018/07/02/weathering-the-storm/. Just thought I would share it with you, because I know you like poetry, and it fits with what you have written here.

    Love you! I am with you in spirit. Sue

    Liked by 1 person

    1. We are one in the Spirit, it’s a song my home church sang a lot when I was younger. 🙂 Thanks, Sue!!! I’m so glad this spoke to you! I was hoping it would speak to others and give God more glory.

      Thank you so much for sharing!! 🙂 I’ll go check it out! He is with us, Sue! Praise God!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I can totally relate to this. As you know, I currently don’t have a job due to disability and now I’m having to wait even longer for a hearing date. There are moments where I don’t know what I’m going to do but then God provides at the very moment we need it. God is so good.
    He knows exactly what we need exactly when we need it.
    Thanks for sharing this!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. ((((Hugs)))). Well done for staying in the place God has called you to be. Although I have never been in a position where God told me not to get a job, I do relate with going through tough financial seasons. God means different things to different people. If there is one thing we know Him as in my home, is that He is Jehovah Jireh. Ah T. R, I can’t count the number of times, He has come through for us. Hopefully someday He allows me to share these significant testimonies as a blog post. Hang in there Sis! Hang in there!
    This week I have been praying with Psalm 91, especially verse 2 where David says “He is my God, and I trust Him”. Trusting God can be really challenging in tough seasons. However our ability to stay trusting depends on how well we know Him. We cannot wait on someone we don’t trust.
    You know Him Sis. I am sure He has provided before. He will do it again. Stay where He has planted you. Be confident in what He has called you and the place He has placed you. Be confident in the fact that you know Him. Keep walking by faith. You will reap if you don’t faint. Lifting you up in prayers tonight.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Wow, Efua!!! ❤ Your response has spoken deeply to my heart and has encouraged my soul! You are so right, it is about trusting Him, and seeing His hand. And you're also right I have seen Him do so many amazing things in my life. He is always at work! ❤ Thank you for the prayers, they are always appreciative. I need to dig into His word more and give Him more prayer time for these specific things I feel. To be guarded and equipped. Thank you for your encouragement!!! God bless you and be with you!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I love it when He places a fresh hunger in our hearts. I love how you recognise the need to go deeper in His word. You are on the right path sister! God bless and be with you too❤️

        Liked by 2 people

      1. My goodness, Donna! I see why this song has spoken to you! The same God on the mountain is the same God in the valley! The same God of the day is the same God in the night! AMEN!

        Liked by 2 people

  6. Wow, so amazing! Thanks for sharing this. I can totally relate to much of what you say here. I’ve spent the better part of my adult life home schooling our three kids… until this past year, that is. When my youngest was in 8th grade, they all 3 went to a private school – something I had always prayed God would provide for if He wanted it to happen. Yet when He did, I found myself doubting the call – partly because home school was so much a part of me by then and partly because my blog just seemed sort of – meh.

    And so I started networking on the blog a bit and doing ministry. I took a part time job tutoring a friend’s kid and thus kept one foot in the homeschool world. And I worked on a novel. When the first novel got pretty ambivalent feedback and the blog didn’t grow, I began to feel totally discouraged. Like you, I felt like a lazy wife because I wasn’t earning money and helping out. Even the fact of chronic migraine made me feel like a loser.

    And really, it was all a lack of trust. I’ve had some incredible times with Lord lately to remind me that He is good no matter what. He reminds me that success doesn’t look like a popular blog or a best-selling book. In fact, success to Him looks like obedience – nothing more. And you know what? For the first time in years, I’m OK with that!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for sharing 🙂 you are so right!! God is good no matter what!! I believe being in the field, where He wants us to be, in time He will show us how to reap fruits.

      I have gotten distracted by letting other people, their thoughts, and opinions about what I should do as a wife to support my husband dictate over God and over what my husband tells me. But knowing that God has assured me and helped me in these times and continues to do so is encouraging.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. You are such a great writer! Sorry that your going through so much. But it sounds like your doing your best to walk by faith. Loved your reminders. Are you following me around or something, LOL.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I’ve been in your shoes before. Almost wanting to give up etc. But God always makes a way in our lives. In the storm, though it’s hard to see and remember that.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Agreed! The closer we are to Him, the more attention and focus we give to Him, His hand and HIs ways are always so clear. Something I want to work on with Him, just giving Him more time.


      3. I have a friend that always tells me when something good or bad happens just say “Praise Jesus.” She always encouraged me to listen to my audio bible on my YouVersion app. By the way, when you get a chance listen to this song Just you and me by Heath Jarvis. I used to play it over and over again. Still do at times.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Your friend has the right way of thinking! A lot of times when things happen that could have gone worse I say, “Thank you, Lord.” Thanks for the song suggestion. I can see why you enjoy the song!

        Liked by 1 person

  8. “The clouds have not parted yet”…But praise God, He is in the clouds with you, carrying you through the darkest moments. Psalm 91:9-12,15
    I can feel your struggle. You are doing the right thing working for God, and He will reward you in all the right ways at all the right times. Have you ever read George Mueller’s biography? God still works this way today! Have confidence in Him! Jehovah Jireh is faithful. You are precious to Him, His precious daughter; He will not fail you.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. God is always with me through the good and bad and through it all, I am grateful. I love how He talks to us as His ways are not our ways! 💙I pray you work on your self-confidence.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Praise God this is such an easy thing to say but so hard to do when everything seems to be against you. Faith as small as a mustard seed is all we need. At times this seems almost impossible. Thanks for your honesty. Continue prayers for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. It’s amazing how God works like that– encouraging us through a song randomly playing on the radio or the pastor at church “just happens” to be preaching on the exact topic your struggling with.

    I will be praying for you. Life is sometimes plain hard.

    To be honest the last couple weeks have been filled up to the brim with fear, anxiety, and today even some tears. The future can be scary, and heartbreak can come out of the blue. Definitely part of the reason I haven’t been able to write and schedule posts the last several days. ):

    Having family members who are not believers, I can totally relate to the degrading comments. Just last week I was confronted face-to-face by one person in particular who called me an unintelligent failure who would always live in my parents basement because I was homeschooled and am now going to a Bible college. So yeah, fun, right? 😦

    It is hard.

    But I know we have a mighty God who shares our burdens and makes our yoke easy!
    I am praying for you and your husband, T.R. Noble! ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh my goodness, Faye!!! I just want to hug you! And whoever said that to you, I will hand an ice cream cone to them so they are occupied with something else instead of your life, and have them quietly walk away and mind their own business. That is ridiculous!!! I’ve been missing you and thinking about you Faye, my goodness, thank you for being open and sharing what has been going on and troubling your heart.

      You are so right, He is mighty and He walks with us every single step!!! ❤ ❤ ❤ And I am so thankful for the moments He speaks to us through music, a small moment and through others. Praise His name!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are so sweet! ❤

        Haha, I will have to remember that ice cream cone tip… 🙂

        Yes, typed out it really does sound ridiculous. But as you know, Satan works his magic, so to speak, and blows up a lie so big that that you begin to believe it.

        Yes, I am planning on writing more posts & scheduling them once again. I've missed blogging! But, it's also been a nice little break the last couple weeks. 😀

        As always, thanks for your wonderful words of wisdom! ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Typed or spoken it hurts and our vulnerabilities will be used against us. What a precious promise we have that Christ helps us bear through the pain and redirects our focus. A promise I cling to ❤ You are always welcome, my sister in Christ.

        Liked by 1 person

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