It Was A Rocky Year, My Playlist Even Reflected It

These songs may not be new to 2018 but they were the ones I found and connected with deeply. I tried to put them in order as I grew attached to them throughout the past year.

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Phil WickhamSecret Place

MandisaBorn For This

Elevation WorshipDo It Again

LedgerForeigner

We As HumanZombie & Let Me Drown

SkilletThe Resistance 

Sara ReevesEasy

TobyMacThe Elements

Casting CrownsHands Of The Potter 

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Last year was about trials and learning to endure despite feeling despair. So many times I was concerned about our finances. Wondering what was I doing and providing as a wife to my husband. I wrote for God and He’s provided a ministry but no money, at this time, comes from it.

I felt eyes were on me and judging me for staying home and being the main cause for our tight budget. 

It was so confusing. Then, the middle of the year, our scariest month dealing with our budget, I questioned my writing. I wondered about the book series. What if this was not something God would use financially? 

Would I still write this?

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It tormented and haunted me for about a week with people’s questions and judgemental advice. But I came to the conclusion I wanted to write a story for God before all of this. I want to write Him a story so I can place it at His feet. It’s a crown He has helped me with, and one I want to give back to Him.

The middle of the year became a series of songs about trusting God even when things feel foreign and I was confused about where I was. To not give up despite others.

God provided with our finances. He helped me stretch our budget. Despite the trial, my marriage didn’t crumble but strengthened. We didn’t have arguments about money. Is this why God has provided a loving husband who enjoys me at home? I’m not the perfect housewife, by far. But I can take care of the home so when he is out he doesn’t have to worry about it.

In the mid-summer, God started pressing deeply on my heart to pray for peers and sisters in Christ. He reminded me of how I prayed for a church in Little Rock, and He provided. I was praying for a church, but never felt led anywhere. But I felt Him press me for a stronger and intimate group of women I could turn to as a sister in Christ. I wasn’t praying for it, so I started.

God blessed me with a dear friend visiting and staying for the weekend twice last year. He blessed small moments with gratitude and He held my hand through fear. He gave me memories that were not tainted in fear. In late July/August, He blessed me with a dear sister in Christ from the blogging community. We started up Bible Study every Wednesday. Through her, I met another sister in Christ, and now we have a group we all communicate together on. Answered prayer. 

Towards the end of the year, songs reflected trials once more with reminders that God is always close to us. We are not forgotten. We can cry out to Him and we are heard. Life is not easy when it comes to God but to draw close to Him, to find the narrow way, it is not easy. But every trial is ultimately worth it. Our growth and gain in Christ becomes more solid in His foundation.

Our budget is still rocky during this time. Prayers for God to direct my husband to a co-op in his field is much appreciated. I am thankful for everything God has taught me and the way He looked out for us even when my fear limited me in trusting Him and seeing how He would always be present.

Don’t give up on God.

He truly has a plan, especially in darkness.

He is, after all, the Light.


Comment Below:
What was your last year like?
Did God use music to speak to you?

May We Praise Him In The HighestThe King Who Was And Is To Come.Lift Up Your Banner Holy PeopleAnd Praise Him As One.

Monthly Scripture- (NLT) 2 Corinthians 5:17, “This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”

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22 thoughts on “It Was A Rocky Year, My Playlist Even Reflected It

  1. Hey T. R! Absolutely POWERFUL! This explains my journey for quite some time! As a matter of fact, as I spoke with someone last night, you literally just described my conversation to them. “He’s provided a ministry but very little money, at this time.” But what I realize is that I’ve been in school, learning from the Teacher Himself. I COULD NOT put a price tag on what He’s taught me during this time! It’s been well worth it, uncomfortable, but WELL-WORTH it. He’s given me strength to press through and I know that I will prevail. Even as I write this response, fresh out of meditation on the very things you wrote about, I’m in awe at how He uses these moments of our lives to encourage fellow believers who may be traveling down similar paths. Be encouraged, new beginnings are on the horizon and His promise to us is in view! I see it, I believe it! Can You?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Praise Jesus for being our Teacher! Isn’t it wonderful we can seek Him as our Shepherd for teaching! Praise Jesus, He is there for us!!! I am so grateful this spoke to you! Glory be to Him! Amen, there always more than what we see in front of us and we must trust Him!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This year I clung to the songs “Fight Anymore” by For All Seasons, “At Your Feet” by Casting Crowns, and “The Way God Sees” by Ginny Owens. 🙂 I love music and how God can speak to me through it! ❤

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  3. The struggles can be so real as are the victories in him.Thank you for opening up. It is almost a guarantee that we will each be fighting battles throughout our lives- but always through a stance of victory because of Christ. I have struggled between working and writing for awhile. So your testimony is dear to my heart. I am starting a job in February but it is low key with little stress and one I can leave easily, if I want to. My last year was tumultuous, as well. We made a major move, needed housing and then my husband’s job fell through. (He finally did get another one, thank the Lord). We also endured a lot of outside family drama in the midst, coupled with trying to make new connections. But we pulled through intact, closer and victorious through Christ. I’ve also watched God heal relationships and supply our needs this year in powerful ways. I understand your testimony of endurance. Continue writing. It’s encouraging. I’m not sure of any particular song that inspired me the most, though “This is how we fight our battles” comes to mind. May God crown your efforts with success!

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    1. Glory be to our Lord and Savior for Him never remaining silent in our trials and storms!!! I praise Him for being with you and your family last year! I am thankful He provided for you despite these trials and He was your strength ❤ it is never easy. Praise the Lord we are not alone! Thank you for sharing!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Beautiful and heartfelt post. I started my journey as a stay at home parent last year. And it has been bumpy financially as well. But I know it is what God wanted me to do. So I just keep trusting that he will provide for us.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Good songs!! My last year was the worst year of my life. Out of the 365 days I can only recall a few “good days”. But, this year is going to be different! And yes, music was one of the things that got me through 2018!! I absolutely love music! 70% of my day is me listening to music!😂 Thanks for sharing!

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  6. Ahh, loving this post, T.R.! There are several songs I wasn’t familiar with but really enjoyed looking up. It’s always cool to connect music to an experience as you’ve done here. Thanks for the new jams! 😉👍🏻

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  7. It’s always inspiring to read your posts. I find myself often times admiring how diligent you are with your blog and in the blogging community. My Mother is a homemaker and author so I grew up seeing how influential her roll is in the home. A lot of the feelings you shared she has also shared with me. My husband and I don’t have children yet but have decided to homeschool so I’ll also one day be hanging up my 9-5. Needless to say l, I appreciate your transparency. Loved the post.

    Liked by 1 person

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